Thankgiving, Sci-fi... other?

おひさしぶりですね。。。

I'll give an example of an ideal sci-fi plot-line;

Crew: Oh no! some alien thingy is trying to kill us!
alien thingy: graaar we keeels you now
Crew: Ah! it was so simple! by crossmodulating the phase discrepencies on our transkapamophic microtelebobers, we were able to unpolarize the quasi-molecular bonds and liquefy the enemy! also, SPLOSIONS EVERYWHERE!!!!
alien: gaaaaa me is dead-ed.

Now the plot of all Stargate: Universe episodes

Character1: I like that girl so much, does she like me back? I wish I wasn't so fat!
Person2: My wife is cheating on me!
Individual8: My daddy doesn't love me, now I'll never achieve my dreams! Oh yeah and we're all in space.

Ive officially given up on the new stargate. Its better to re-watch GOOD sci-fi (starwars, startrek tng, firefly, sg1) over and over than watch this shit ONCE. Seriously, they might as well call this piece of crap "Stargate: Purgatory" because nothing ever happens there... its just monotonous, ponderous torture. Even when its being horrible, it does it slower than a 5 year old walking to the kitchen to get "the big spoon" because he ate all the dog-treats again. If you are going to be BAD, do it quickly, like "League of Extraordinary Gentleman", not like "Where the Heart Is".

Thanksgiving day was amazing, as always, due to the high-caliber of my family members and the high-deliciousness of my mothers cooking. She makes this pretzel jello stuff that LOOKS nasty, but is fulfilling enough to be eaten with (or as) every meal of the day. The only food better than thanksgiving dinner (although it came down to a toss up between this and frozen pizza, I'll admit) is LEFTOVER thanksgiving dinner. For the past 2 days I've been eating it for breakfast, lunch and dinner, and I haven't had it this good in roughly 360 days.

Another thanksgiving tradition for many families, mine included, is football. I'm not the biggest fan (I really only follow the NBA) but its always fun to watch if I'm with family. I noticed something this year, however, that led me to the conclusion that there is something terribly wrong with Professional sports. while watching, I saw an athlete of unusual size (AOUS) run to the sideline and hold his mouth open. This was confusing until a squirrely looking deformed dude (Really he could have been Gollum's younger, downs-syndrome brother) gleefully squirted water into his mouth, whereupon the sparkly Goliath tromped off to wreak mayhem on his enemies. This brings up a NUMBER of objections;

1. Why are there 6'8 men running around in shiny outfits hitting each other? Is this cirque de soliel meets the NBA? Since when are these guys nearly monolithic in stature?
2. How come this man can't be bothered to pick up a water bottle? Isn't it his JOB? Can you imagine if an accountant hired someone else to pick up his stapler for him every 30 seconds, or if that priest-dude from the temple of doom had someone just DROP a beating heart into his hand to crush, rather than wrench it from the ribcage himself?
3. WHY IS SOMEONE BEING PAID TO SQUIRT WATER AT A GIANT, SHINY MAN IN A HELMET?!?! I mean cmon... wait... Actually, come to think of it, I'd take that job in a heartbeat.

I've had dozens of interesting stories and anecdotes to share with you fine people, but for some reason I've been battling with writers block of late. Hopefully I will get back into rhythm and post with frequency again.

P.S. - I haven't checked here in a while, and I just noticed the anonymous comment on my PREVIOUS post about getting friend-dumped... but really, can I be expected to understand something after being told just FIVE times? No. Thats madness. Its like telling a kitten "BAD KITTY! DOWN!" when its climbing on the screen. No matter how loud you shout, Will it ever stop? Of course not. It just. Doesn't. Under. Stand. But blast the little son-of-a-bitch in the face with a spray bottle just ONE time, and it will learn right quick that climbing is a no-no. I NEED the spray bottle, people. I might not be so quick in the head, but I'm not insane.

Yoyakusuru

I had my braces tightened again today. On my way back to boulder I hit traffic on the I25, AND highway 36... took me about 4 hours when it normally takes me about an hour and a half. Traffic sucks, especially when every single radio station is playing that Taylor Swift song where she is like "I like you more than your girlfriend likes you, but im ugly and boring" on repeat.

In excellent news though, my orthodontist told me I should have my braces off "Soon". His exact word. "Soon". I'm excited, but don't want to get my hopes up. "Soon" can mean anything, after all. The Christians in 1 AD knew that Jesus would return "soon", And I know that a guy who drinks a quart of ipecac will vomit "soon". Whether its 6 weeks or 6 months, I can't wait to finally get these things off. I can see it now... flossing in under 30 minutes... eating corn straight off the cob... kissing a girl without the nagging fear that something gets snagged and rips... ah. It will be heaven.

I've managed to own a car for nearly four years without knowing the first thing about how it works, or how to maintain it. When minor problems arise, I ignore them until the car completely breaks down and becomes unusable, forcing me to actually learn something about vehicle maintenance. Its the same stratagem I employ in my personal life; assume everything will be perfect, ignoring all minor and major problems until they culminate with a massive explosion and shattered self-esteem. Cars, fortunately, don't make you feel nearly as worthless and lonely when they break.

Ever been friend dumped? its like getting regular dumped, except more insulting and less emotionally traumatic. Normally when you get dumped, the girl/guy conveys a message something like "You're a great person, but I just don't see this working out." The message in a friend breakup however, is more of a "I don't want to look at you, hear you, or think about you ever again. Go away."

I'm going to the Colorado beer festival on Saturday! woot woot!