Xbox

These are 100% real, undoctored message correspondences I've had through XBOX live

From XxPhilDaKillaxX, after a game of Call of Duty
Pk - Pray and spry bich
Me - um... I'm sorry?
Pk - use a rel gun not a (expletive) ppsh get some skill (expletive) noob
Me - Get some skill? I could try learning the Violin, I hear that's tough. Or stone-masonry... good for the arms. Is there something particular you were recommending?
Pk - wtf you (expletive) jst stop being so gay and actaully aim
Me - But I can't help being so happy to play call of duty with you, friend!
Pk - omg you suck

From diabolicalshrew after a game of Soul Calibur
DS - omfg you noob stop spamming lows (expletive) spammer.
Me - Maybe you could try blocking once in a while instead of using ->Y over and over... however, your point does have SOME validity. Perhaps if you agree to a rematch, I can spam high and beat you?
DS - wtf screw you im reporting your cheating ass
Me - A shame. good luck with ->Y comrade. FOR THE MOTHERLAND

From x0xMalcomRenoldsx0x after Halo III
MR - Dude you suck ass, I (expletive) killed you 11 times and you only got me once. Just give up loser. You must have toothpicks jammed in your eyes to suck that much.
ME - You are mistaken. There was a secret objective to see who could get the most consecutive deaths in a row. I kicked your ass man. No contest.
MR - Dude wtf?
ME - Yeah. Better luck next time noob. I'll destroy you every single time.