What I say, o?

(mundane topic, mildly amusing analogies throughout, possible sci-fi reference)

(ironic segway)

Every once in a while, when things are going (relatively) well, the powers that be think to themselves "How can we screw with Zach today?" Now don't get me wrong, I am not saying that I am the most important guy on the earth, so special that the creators of all things take time out of their schedules to meddle in my affairs.

Have you ever been walking, and seen a pebble or a can on the path, and kicked it? Sure. Why? because you were bored. The object did nothing to anger you, and its not as though you have a personal hatred of discarded trash (assuming your father was not killed by homicidal refuse before your eyes at a young age*). It was just something to do to make your journey from A to B slightly less saw-me-in-half-with-a-nailfile boring. What will happen to the trash after you forcefully evict it from its cozy little dwelling place? You don't care.

*If you actually witnessed your fathers murder at the hands of evil garbage, I don't mean to offend. You have my sincere condolences.

To a supreme being, I am a piece of trash in the road, punted skyward for no purpose other than a moments amusement. I'd like to think that I am least something awesome like a balled up bit of foil, and not something lame like a "Diet Rootbeer" can. Who drinks diet rootbeer anyway? Does anyone ever go into a safeway, down the soda aisle, and think "Man, I've just got a terrible strong hankering for some sweet, bubbly drink. Oh look, Praise the Lord! DIET rootbeer! I'm saved!"? Anyone that buys a diet rootbeer, for any reason, ever, is less interesting than a piece of bread bobbing up and down in a pond, so soggy even the ducks won't eat it.

We, as human beings, have no control over the boot-clad toes of the gods. At any given moment they may strike us in our rears, displacing us from our comfort zones. All we can do is rub our sore derrieres, futilely shake our fists at the sky, and try our best to adapt to our new surroundings. Confucius once said "Shit happens", And it is by those wise words of wisdom that I try to live my life.